promuseboxing | (no subject)

You can't go home again. And Carolina isn't, she knows she isn't. This is just another form of work, tidying up her father's house so that it can be sold and she won't have to worry about it anymore. The sooner she takes care of things the sooner she could go back to work. It doesn't bother her that she's spending her christmas alone. After her mother died her family didn't care much for celebrating. Leonard is spending the holiday when his girlfriend so the task of cleaning up the family home falls to her.

Joy.

She hasn't been back to Reach in years, not since she started law school. Not even for her father's funeral. There had been a major case her firm was working on and she had refused to step away and let someone take over so she could go and stare at a box being lowered into the ground. It wasn't like he had ever been a father to her after all, and she learned a long time ago that tearing herself apart to try and gain his approval was a losing fight.

It's strange being back, the house feels bigger than it used to now that her father's oppressive energy had gone away with him. She doesn't even bother unpacking, doesn't dare get drawn into the task of sorting out the house yet. The kitchen is empty, cleaned out when they got the news that Leonard Sr. was never leaving the hospital in Chorus. Instead, she walks back out the door and heads for one of the places in Reach she still has fond memories of. The Mother of Invention is still there and she's pleased to see the coffee shop has actually grown and expanded into the bookstore next door. Stepping inside is like stepping back in time to five years ago. She had always been coming here with York and... well. Those were good memories even if the relationship hadn't survived her leaving for law school in Boston.

She orders her old favorite drink and is so caught up in her own thoughts that Carolina doesn't even see York until it's too late to avoid him. What is he even doing back in Reach, she would have thought he'd have moved on by now. "...York." God, what does she even say? "It's... it's been a while."

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York, likewise, doesn't notice Carolina until they're both at the counter waiting for their drinks, and the people standing between them claim theirs and step away. It leaves them with no barrier, and even reading emails on his phone her red hair catches his eye. He's always loved red hair, but when he glances up -- it's her. The one that got away, as he calls Carolina when he drinks a little too much and falls into maudlin territory. He hasn't seen her in years now. Not since she'd ended things abruptly before leaving for law school. He'd tried to keep in touch for awhile, but she hadn't answered... her father hadn't thought much of him, York knew. So he'd stopped emailing her and over the years he'd tried to move on, but sometimes his thoughts wandered back. Sometimes he still dreamed about her.

And now she's standing right in front of him, hair the same shade of red as in his memory, eyes the same green, but some new lines on her face. Not older -- more mature. Just as beautiful.

Then he realizes he's staring, and she's waiting for an answer.

"Hey, Li-- Carolina." He doesn't get to call her by his pet name, not after all this time, and corrects himself quickly. "Yeah, a long time. How've you been..? Home for the holidays?"

He sounds like an idiot. He doesn't particularly care, as long as she stays and answers the questions.

It's strange, seeing him after all this time. After the breakup Carolina tried to make it as clean a break as possible, she moved to the city and didn't reach out to him at all. It had been easier to cut herself off so that she didn't lose her focus. After all, her father had pointed out that York had his own plans after graduating, plans that she couldn't in good conscience hold him back from. He would have been waiting for three years while she got her degree and she knew he had a pile of job offers that he would have passed up because of her.

Some days she still regrets the decision, especially on the anniversary of their first date rolls around.

He hasn't changed much and she hears the stumble where he avoids her old pet name, tries to ignore the pang in her chest when he pulls back from it. "I've been fine. I'm just in town to clean out my father's house so we can list it for sale. He died last month and--" Oh. Shit. That is definitely not casual small talk. That is an info dump she already wishes she could strike from the record. Fuck.

"Sorry," There's no way to hide the color rising in her cheeks. "Is there any chance I can get a redo on that?"

Holy shit, what?

York's entire manner changes, his eyes going wide and lips parting slightly as he fumbles to process what he's just been told. If he'd known that when he first saw her, he would have approached this conversation very differently, that's for sure. Now that he knows all he can do is try to help, how can he -- oh.

"Not really, cat's out now. But uh... do you need a hand clearing things out? That kind of thing's always easier with company, and if nothing else I'm a good pack mule."

Some things never change, including York being just as sweet now as he was five years ago. Carolina knows she shouldn't have said anything about her father, it isn't the sort of thing that you share easily or casually. It's not that she isn't mourning her father, just that she doesn't precisely know how. It's not as if her father ever prepared her to handle loss, especially since he lost the ability to be a decent parent after her mother passed away.

And now York wants to help.

She shakes her head, reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind one ear. "You don't need to do that, I'll be fine. I wouldn't want you wasting your holiday on this."

"Hey, why do you think I'm getting coffee here? I've got a coffeemaker at home -- I needed a break from all the holiday stuff. But if you don't want me to, that's okay."

Even after all this time, York wants Carolina to feel like she can be honest with him. Like she can open up, though she always played things close to the chest and it wasn't something like this. The loss of her father, who he knows the relationship with was... not the best. He's not going to shit talk a dead man in front of his daughter, though.

"It's no trouble, if you could use the help."

"Are you sure you want to spend your vacation cleaning out my father's house?" It's not like her father made a secret of the fact that he disapproved of York being with her. But she had liked spending time with York, liked the way he made her feel like she could be honest about things. It had been a refreshing change from the barbed attitudes at home.

She knows what she ought to say. A polite thank you for the offer followed by a firm rejection. He doesn't need to waste his time on this.

And yet, against her better judgment, Carolina finds herself smiling at him ever so slightly. "If you're sure, I suppose I wouldn't mind a little help." He's bound to change his mind once he looks at the size of the task in front of him.

"Am I sure I want to take a break from the family madness and spend some time helping out an old friend? Yeah. Very sure."

York stumbles slightly over the word friend, but he wants to think of her that way. He still cares about her. Probably still loves her on some level, if all his attempts to move on have ended in failure. And he'll try not to think ill of the dead while he's there, even... her father had hated him, he knew that, but it'll be fine. He's there for Carolina, not for him. It's just a house.

"I have my car, I know it's only a few blocks down but I can drive you back. I was on this side of town for some errands and to stall for time."

"Is it really that bad?"

Loud, chaotic holidays are something Carolina has never experienced. Even when she was with York she found reasons to avoid being invited to any major family events. As if she knew that seeing a large family gathering would hammer home just how broken her own home was. Even before her mother died their holidays were small, neither Leonard nor Alison having much in the way of relatives.

Maybe it's selfish to not want to be alone as she exorcises her father's ghost, item by item but she's not going to say no.

"Alright, you've convinced me. But the moment your family starts missing you I'm going to kick you out."