promuseboxing | (no subject)

The signs that something was off in Carolina's body were subtle at first. It had been five years on Barrayar, five long years caught in a war that felt like it would never end. There were little things that made life easier, like the implanted birth control that kept things from getting overly complicated. It was a standard UNSC issue implant, meant to last for years without any sort of upkeep. It was also the kind of thing that was supposed to be replaced a long time ago.

When the symptoms started it was easy to think it was a bug. The nausea was the worst of it, striking at random and at the worst possible times. Then there were the headaches, the dizziness. All of it combined together painted a picture that didn't look good and then spread out over a long enough period of time that after a point Carolina couldn't keep hiding it. York was the first one to notice something was off, of course. But then Wash and Sonia noticed as well and then it was only a matter of time before she gave in and went to see the medic for something to help.

Turns out that what was ailing her was a lot more obvious than she thought. The diagnosis was unexpected, absolutely paralyzing because it was something she had never really considered for herself. Now... sitting in the tent that she shared with York she tried to figure out how to tell him that she was pregnant. Carolina knew he would be happy; York would be a good father. The problem was her and the likelihood that she would ruin a child just like her father had ruined her.

"Dammit..."

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"I'm already on one knee and everything," he points out, beaming. It's true -- he's still kneeling in front of her, even if he doesn't have a ring or anything. And no idea where he'd go about getting something like that, here and now. All he can do, because it's better than nothing and she deserves a better proposal than his realization about Barrayaran propriety, is reach up and unfasten his dog tags, offering them to her in lieu of a ring. The sentiment is similar, at least.

"Guess I am. I can do a little better, though." York clears his throat, which could just be to lighten the mood except when he speaks again his voice is low and perfectly serious. He means this one. "Carolina, will you marry me?"

The tags are better than any ring he could offer, a little piece of the past they shared when they were younger. A link in a chain that connected the moment they met in Errera to this moment. She's lost him once and no matter the awful things they've seen during the course of the war she can't help but be endlessly grateful to whatever cosmic twist brought them here.

She winds the chain of the tags around her hands and then reaches out to cup York's face carefully, a smile softening the tired lines of her face as she leans in to kiss him.

"Yes, of course I'll marry you." Not for propriety but because she wants it.